Here’s your weekly sixty-second recap of The Bachelor!
In a stunning move, The Bachelor saw Peter Weber remove a rose, reducing the number of women he would be keeping around and then immediately regretting the decision.
We left off last week reeling from the effects of “Champagne-Gate.” So things would have to naturally slow down…. right?
Alayah, former Miss Texas, was stirring things up, whether she knew it or not! “Cheers to all of you bitches, I love you,” Alayah exclaimed as she learned she’d be going on Peter’s group date. Que Sydney who is set to reveal Alayah’s “intentions” to Peter, “With Alayah, I can tell something’s off about that girl,” she says. “She is just all fake.” This, rose lovers, is what’s known as foreshadowing.
“Wake up you maggots! Rise and shine!” bellows Demi, who then orders the women downstairs for their group date instructions. Her two “henchwomen,” Champagne and Killer, pass out bags to all the women going on the group date. And of course, things don’t get violent.
“Show me you want it!” bellows Peter from the crowd, as Sydney pulls Alayah’s hair, but then Alayah plunks herself down on top of her opponent and earns the victory. “What am I supposed to do?” fumes Sydney. “It’s a f—ing elephant sitting on a rat. How are you gonna get up?”
Oh, it keeps going!
The pair sit down for a “friendly” discussion. “You sound so rehearsed,” Sydney says, “and so, like, on… But if you come in here worrying about how you’re perceived, then you’re not going to be your real self to Peter. And, like, that’s what he’s here to find, like a real person.”
Sydney is out to get Alayah booted from the house.
“When I’m in the house with some girls, it’s two different things,” she explains. “And like when the cameras show up and the lights are on, and there’s that time for some camera time, like, it’s like a whole different person… I just, like, don’t want you to get blinded by that.”
Peter is now freaking out and eventually just keeps on freaking out even more!
“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t feel something for you,” Alayah later says to Peter through tears. “And now to think that it’s possible that you think I’m being fake just sucks.”
And just when things look like they’ve been healed up between Peter and Alayah, Victoria P (who had a great date that we aren’t even going to be able to touch in this recap) tells Peter, “I probably had spent, maybe, like collectively three hours with her [Alayah],” she tells Peter. “It’s difficult for me to be in this position, but I do know that she asked that I not tell producers that we knew one another, and I didn’t really understand why.”
BOOM! Looks like Peter is done with Alayah and confronts her to which she openly admits she said but did so in order to make sure that both she and Victoria P. could be on the show together.
Head onto the Rose Ceremony and Peter gets to the final two roses and then decides to pull one of them, making it very clear that he was going to keep Alayah but has now decided not to do so.
“There’s been a little bit of a change tonight,” Chris announces. “This is now the final rose tonight.” And it goes to… Mykenna! Alayah, Jasmine, Alexa, and Sarah all head home and collect your box of wine and free t-shirt on the way out!
However, immediately, Peter has another change of heart and tells producers he will regret sending Alayah home and leaves the impression that he wants her to return. Cue the teaser for next week’s episode.
And that is The Bachelor in sixty-seconds. Maybe longer if you read slow!
P.S. Can we keep Mykenna around each week just so we can watch her squirm at each rose ceremony?
This is post P-90x. I’m saying I watched the videos. I’m not saying I participated. Born in my mom’s basement, I’ve stayed there to embody the stereotype. One day I will rise up… to the main floor of the house.